Same time every day; my internal alarm wakes me.
Darkness is not my friend.
I transition from a kaleidoscope of sensory images as if watching a movie in fast motion. Directed by me. Dreams, dreams, dreams
Slowly, daze like, careful not to wake my husband, I wrap myself in my favorite bathrobe
I choose the same one most days – sky blue, faded, worn and stained. Probably time to say good-bye but who says good-bye to an old friend? Too much history.
I venture downstairs, turn on the coffee, and open all the blinds. Every last one. They must be open when I welcome the day. Soon.
Fire blazing, candle lit, warm throw blanket, standard poodle at my feet. Cradling my warm coffee, I sip. Like a baby with her first sippy cup. Heart cracked wide open.
Light peeks in – welcome, welcome. To my safe place. My happy place. My quiet place.
So begins my sacred time – reserved for me. Wordle first. Music meditation.
Serenity Prayer
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Positive energy to my loved ones. Visualize their faces, touches, smiles.
Memories, like waves ebb and flow. I treat each one with care. Own it, feel it, then let it go. Never to be fully gone.
Breathe.
I Breathe in strength. Breath out anxiety.. Over. And over. And over.
I try to live by the three G’s – grace, gratitude, and a sprinkle of gossip.
I write. I read. Or ok – I shop on line.
Until I hear the bedroom door open and my husband calls to me
“Good morning, dear.” I am born again.
20,500 mornings together
We remain in our separate spaces
Until I bring him a cup of coffee
As is our custom
Many little things we do for one another
At this stage, our conversation revolves around how we slept, how we feel, how are we doing with our puzzles, plans for the day, what’s for dinner
No matter what, we’re in it together
All’s right with the world
For now
Which is all we really have
Energized
And eager to face the day
My safe place.
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